He was a randy old guy--definitely a ladies man. Fidelity was not his thing. He was lusty and he didn’t need a little blue pill. Romeo earned his name. He was all attitude and he jousted with the other guys for dominance. We called him our Turbo Tortoise. The Energizer Bunny® had nothing on him. Romeo didn’t have the sense to come in out of the rain. We imagined him like a little Gene Kelly splashing in puddles and twirling an umbrella.

Romeo died last week and left a huge hole in our hearts. Reptiles don’t appeal to everyone. They are not warm and fuzzy, but they are fascinating creatures with their own unique personalities. Like all pets, they bring much joy to our lives. We form special bonds with our adopted animal friends. When they are gone, we grieve their loss.

We buried Romeo in the yard with rose petals and a clay butterfly that my mother donated “to keep him from being lonesome.” When I told another relative about Romeo’s passing, he joked, “Well, at least you didn’t need to buy a coffin. He already came with one.” I was not amused. But then, this guy goes out and shoots Bambi.

When I’m tempted to feel sorry for myself, I think of all the people who lost their four-legged family members in the wake of Hurricane Katrina. I recall the story of that young autistic boy whose only attachment was to his beloved tortoise. I was enraged when I heard that other children had brutally stabbed that child’s only friend.

At times like these, I remember that all things change and that pain is a part of life. I also remind myself about relativity and I send loving-kindness and compassion to all people who are suffering the loss of a pet, the loss of a child, spouse or other loved one.

When I was 5, I got whacked in the head with a baseball bat, fracturing my skull. Master Certified Relationship Coach Laurie Cameron compares fear to getting whacked by a big cosmic 2 by 4. In her book, The Journey From Fear to Love: Waking Up and Walking the Evolutionary Relationship Path with Your Partner, Cameron encourages readers to focus on the choices that we do have instead of being angry about the ones that we don’t have.

It’s been said that good things come in small packages. This small gem features case studies of real people who have moved from fear to confidence, from panic to inner peace. The tone is friendly and conversational. The 152 pages are seasoned with inspiring quotations, sample case studies and interactive exercises that are structured so that readers can measure their progress on the continuum between an unconscious relationship on one end and an evolutionary relationship on the other.

Cameron says that when we feel incomplete without a partner or choose to sacrifice our own dream and then try to blame our partner, we are acting from a place of fear instead of love. Instead of living a fear-filled unconscious life, we can choose something different. We can choose love over fear and learn to travel the conscious, intentional path.

We can start small and focus on the loving steps we can take in the moment. Cameron encourages us to ask, “What thought can I choose right now that will create an expanded sense of love and inner peace in this situation?”

Cameron invites readers to wake up to the world around and inside them. The Journey From Fear to Love offers a blueprint to consciously create the environment that will allow our relationships to shift away from fear and toward love. It suggests steps we can take to deepen and express our love regardless of our age. These simple but profound principles apply to all relationships, including the most important relationship we have—the relationship with ourselves.

Your home is the framework within which you project your personal essence, and in which you will likely set the tone for your relationship. Therefore, you will want it to not only reflect who you are, but how you wish to be seen.

Following are a few rules and regulations for maintaining a seductive setting au deux, as well as for those alone times, however infrequent they may be.

• First and foremost, keep your home tidy and clean.
• Depending on the weather, remember to open windows. Fresh air is vital.
• Eliminate odors that are unpleasant to the olfactory senses.
• Conversely, whenever appropriate, cook foods and use fragrances (such as scented candles) that are appealing without being overwhelming.
• Mend, replace, or remove anything that is in disrepair or unsightly.
• Store emergency foods, repair items, first-aid medications, etc. for easy access.
• Play low-volume atmospheric music during mealtime or before retiring, to your (mutual) tastes.
• Discourage intrusive noise, whether from outside your home or within.
• Set boundaries of space. If you are a pet-owner, expect your dogs or cats or parrots or goldfish to comply. The same is true of roommates or other family members. Your space is just that—yours.
• Make recent issues of newspapers, news and lifestyle magazines available for browsing.
• Always offer guests something appropriate to drink or eat.
• If the bedroom is to be made accessible, be sure the bedding is fresh, that extra towels are available, and that the bathroom does not overwhelm with your personal arsenal of medications, cosmetics, etc. Make this room particularly appeal to all the senses, to whatever degree you are able: smell, sound, sight, taste, and touch. 
• Do not apologize for lack of anything to offer your guest or of perceived inadequacies of your home. By inviting someone into your abode, you are sharing an intimate part of yourself.
• Enjoy your home as an entertainment center for others, and as a safe haven for yourself.

The more pride you take in your home, the more pleasure you provide in it for others.